"Oh, hello and Happy St. Patrick's Day! My name is Bono O'Bennigan and I'm the legendary Leprechicken! What's that? You say you've never heard of me? Don't feel bad, few have. That's because while St. Pat gets all the credit for driving the snakes out of Ireland and Leprechauns are famous for their pots of gold, I'm responsible for all the things about pseudo-Irish culture that are a wee bit less charming. Specifically, car bombs, "Kiss Me, I'm Irish" t-shirts and Michael Flatley. And I'm here to tell you that I might not sneak into your homes at night and poop in your potatoes or turn your kids' hair red or hum the Notre Dame fight song in your ear while you sleep if you don't donate some cash to Clark's Muffinquest campaign (fight cancer and get a muffin named after the lad at Tre Amici @ The Bunker in Ybor City in the process)...but why take that unnecessary risk?"
